10 Tips to Come Up With Good Comebacks and Win Verbal Confrontations

We noticed at are school that everyone comes up with crappy come backs, so these are some tips to maake your come backs better.

Disclaimer: we do not take any responsebility in the outcomes of these insults and comebacks. I am a trained expert and have a masters degrees in the art of a comeback Fu and my young grass hopper Jonothino has a lot of promise.

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Step 1: Rule 1

Rule 1: dont use generic comebacks such as "i know you are but what am i".

Step 2: Rule 2

Rule 2: get to the point of the joke. if you take to long people will get bored of the joke.

Step 3: Rule 3

rule 3: use indirect humour alot. but if you make it to witty they wont get it.

Step 4: Rule 4

Rule 4: dont swear . that just ruins a great comeback and as i said in rule 1 its cliched and generic.

Step 5: Rule 5

rule 5: dont use the "finger". It shows that you coundn't come up with something smart to say even if you tried "hint,hint".

Step 6: Rule 6

rule 6: dont get angry. stay calm even if your oppenent made a good come back. they just want a reaction from you and if you get angry they will be more confident and they will have the upper hand.

Step 7: Rule 7

rule 7: if they get physical and angry you might notice that they will just push you and don't really make any swings. they want you to swing first.

Step 8: Rule 8

rule 8:dont usually laugh at your own jokes. instead just smile while your freinds laugh at him/her. you can laugh but wait until your friends have started laughing because your comeback might be crap.

Step 9: Rule 9

rule 9: try and pin point bad things about the other person and use it indirectly (rule 2] against them.

Step 10: Rule 10

rule 10: be confident and speak in a casual voice, unles your being sarcastic when you should be a bit more confrontational. if you speak in a scared or angry voice [rule 6] it implies that they have power.

Step 11: Outro

that basically sums it up. try and develope your own style of comebacks and you should be 'disin' as they say in the hood in no time.

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    12 Discussions


    10 years ago

    Hey, this is a great instructable and is very informative. Just one thing is missing... pictures! It really helps a lot when trying to follow directions so you should consider taking some photographs. Once you do that and leave me a message when you have so that we can publish your work. Thanks! Thanks for the cool instructable and we hope to publish this soon!


    3 years ago

    i really needed to see this web site because im not good at making comebacks when it comes to my friends.


    Reply 10 years ago on Introduction

    Hi Super_mario, me and my freind are 'nerdish' people so wankers in are class always try to annoy us. we relised that if there going to do this all the time we might as well defend areselves with are high IQ and witty jokes. I came up with that becuase im awesome and modest. PM if you agree.

    Saturn Vjj8279

    Reply 9 years ago on Introduction

    I just use logic to confound them. Example: Discribe nothing. If you think of a black screen, you're wrong. Black is something. If you think clear, or white, those are also something. So what does nothing look like, unless nothing looks like nothing at all. But what could it look like?

    Saturn VMakinItHappen

    Reply 9 years ago on Introduction

    i'm not discribing nothing. All I'm doing is stating that nothing doesn't look black, white, or clear, because they are something.  So I confuse them by trying to figure out what nothing liiks like, and if it looks like somthing, then that makes it somthing, therefore contradicting the concept of nothing. Quite simple, really, when you think about it.


    Reply 3 years ago

    Some "nerd" you spelled like 8 words wrong in that statement.For example areselves should be ourselves and because you were talking about a person or people it should be their not there. So yes, your very high IQ must have failed you.