Signs of a Toxic Relationship
We all desire and hope tobe in a healthy relationship, not just romantically but also with those around
us. Sometimes we are in these relationships so long, we don’t even realize
whether or not the relationship is healthy or not. We often live life day to
day without recognizing that the relationship we think is healthy is really
toxic. Sometimes we live in these toxic relationships so long it becomes our
“normal”. However, just because something is normal to you, it doesn’t mean it
is right. Toxic relationships are poisonous, harmful, malicious, and can even
cause death. There are many signs of a toxic relationship. Today I will give
you 4 signs that the relationship that you are engaged in is TOXIC.
1.You are the only one putting in work in the
relationship. A relationship requires two people actively
working each day to make it better. It can’t survive off of who has done
what in the past, but it matters who is putting work in at this present
moment. One person doing all the work will not make a relationship
healthy. It will result in you feeling drained. It is like a bank account.
If no deposits are being made, then you can’t make a withdrawl unless it
will end in the negative. If a person isn’t investing anything in the relationship,
then they shouldn’t be enjoying any returns. You deserve a relationship
with someone who thinks you are worth making an investment
2.You start to lose yourself in the relationship. You wake
up one day and realize you don’t know yourself anymore. Maybe you used to
do things you loved that you no longer do anymore. You could be less
energetic and excited about life. You could have compromised who you were
without realizing in order to stay in a relationship. You don’t speak your
mind about things that actually bother you because you want to keep peace.
A healthy relationship allows you to be yourself. You should be completely
comfortable being YOU, and not have to worry whether the other person
won’t accept you.
3.You aren’t allowed to grow or change. Whenever,
you start to grow or better yourself, it is viewed negatively, mocked, or
even ignored. Your efforts, dreams, or goals aren’t supported or
encouraged. Maybe you support them, but nothing you do is acknowledged.
They can be critical or judgmental of anything you may do. Personal growth
and development should be welcomed and encouraged in a healthy
4.The person word and actions often disagree. They tell
you one thing, but their actions show another. They could tell you how
appreciated you are, but their actions say you have no value to them. They
always tell you what they are going to do, but they never perform.
Sometimes they will tell you anything for the moment if they feel in
danger of you leaving or if you are upset. Then after the storm is over,
they are back to doing the same thing over again. Healthy relationships
should reflect a person’s word lining up with their actions. Words are
powerful, but when the actions show otherwise, it holds no value.
If you can identify withany of those signs, you may want to evaluate your relationship. Here are some
questions that you should ponder to help you realize THE STEPS you need to taker if your relationship is
Does the relationship provide an even
give-and-take exchange of energy?
Does this person celebrate my success?
Am I completely fatigued when I’m with the
person and energetic when they’re gone?
Is my fear of starting over or newness the
only thing that is holding me back?
Do I find myself missing the old me?
Am I the only one investing in the relationship?
Do I feel good about myself when I am with
If you find yourself in a toxic relationship, begin to take the steps of being in a healthy relationship.
It may not be the easiest thing for you to do, but you are worth it. You have the
power to do anything you want to do!!