Intro: 'Cuz Peanut Butter and Jelly Is for the Weak.
Have you ever tried to make dinner only too be told you're using too much butter? Or have you tried to put a 6-pack of Orane Crush in your shopping cart, only to be told that: "Orange soda is what fat people drink!" Well the inner fatboy has taken charge tonight. The wife is asleep and cannot stop the fatboy's awesomeness. Instead of packing a mere PBJ sandwhich, I create: THE KRAKEN. This is a sandwhich that takes "no" for and answer only so that it may wipe it's butt with "no". Chuck Norris pooped a little when he became aware of its existence.
Step 1: Get Your Act Straight Son.
To make the Kraken you will need a few simple things:
Jiff Extra Crunchy Peanut Butter. (Jiff is the ultimate peanut butter. All other peanut butters must bow before mighty Jiff. If you prefer Adams all natural peanut butter, I have some Patchouli to trade for your neglected shaving razors. Begone from this page hippie)
Nutella (Nutella is the Spam of chocolates. Because of the shortage of chocolate in World War II, Pietro Ferrero used hazelnuts to extend the supply of chocolate.)
M & M easter candy If I have to explain, you wouldn't understand.
Step 2: Putting It Together.
Assemble the sandwich as you would a regular PB&J, except that you will toss aside the inferior sugar-free strawberry preserves. For the non PB side of the sandwich a healthy insulation layer of Nutella should be spread. Shamelessly grab a handful of M&Ms and strategically place them on the peanut butter. join the two slices of bread and you have created an unapologetic sandwich of rebellion.