Hooded sweatshirts are awesome. But around moving machinery, those dangley, face-adjacent drawstrings are a terrible idea! Oh, why so deadly, little hoodie?

Here's how to make your favorite hoodie less lethal -- and I did it at TechShop!

Step 1:

You could just pull the drawstring out, I suppose -- but that'd take away one of the main features of the hoodie: cinching it around your face to protect you from papparazzi. Or what-have-you.

So we're going to cut these short, instead.

First, make sure you'll have enough drawstring left when you're done. Stretching the hood out a little bit will pull the strings into it. That's as much drawstring as it'll ever need.

Step 2:

Tie a new knot right below where the drawstring leaves the hood.

I like a simple overhand-knot, because I can tie it with one hand for the picture. Blam.

Step 3:

We're going to cut the string just below the new knots, but these drawstrings tend to fray. So I'm using a bit of heat-shrink tubing to create an aglet!

Eyeball it so that you'll have enough tubing for both drawstrings, and a bit left over for testing.

Step 4:

Here it is: the point of no return.

So I cut it well-below where I expect it to end. Just leave a bit of drawstring to do a test with.

SLICE!

Step 5:

Next, cut off a couple little bits of heat-shrink tubing for some testing.

Step 6:

Slide the tubing over one of the remnants of the drawstrings, and heat it up with a heat-gun -- you want to make sure it's the right diameter to shrink down tight.

This looks about right to me.

(WARNING: I did not finish my degree in aglet-making. I dropped out in the last semester of my fourth year, to pursue the circus.)

Step 7:

Enough tests, poindexter!

Slide the tubing over the ends of the drawstrings, and snug them up against the knots.

If a small plastic kudu wanders into frame, ask him to take a picture of you heating up the heat-shrink tubing!

Step 8:

Really, man?

This isn't even a little like what we talked about.

Step 9:

Ok.

So, apparently kudu are ungulates, and think that I should have known that it's hard to aim the camera properly with hooves.

Fine. Lesson learned.

Once it's shrunken down tight, cut the tubing as neatly as possible under the overly watchful eyes of yet another meddling plastic beast.

Step 10:

With some nice sharp scissors, you should wind up with a pair of neatly trimmed drawstrings, wrapped in classic matte-black!

Your results may vary -- in that it may or may not attract a tiny rhinoceros.

In the event of a rhinoceros, avoid eye-contact and wait for him to take an interest in one of the other tiny plastic creatures.

Step 11:

Alright, he's headed off with that judgmental elephant, to commit all manner of plastic misdeeds, no doubt.

And there you have it! A less-lethal hoodie!

Enjoy!