What’s your favorite girl scout cookie?
Do you like chocolate pie? With a suede-like finish?
Do you like to say smug stuff like “Oh, this homemade salted bourbon caramel, samoa cookie inspired, coconut chocolate pie has an oreo crust. There's five kinds of coconut in it. I just threw it together from stuff I had on hand. Go ahead, try it. It’s vegan.”
Oh, Good. This is your pie.
Step 1: Pie Overview
Let’s look quickly at our construction:
This is a no-bake refrigerator pie. We have an Oreo crust filled with a dense chocolate pudding that is barely sweet, topped with two kinds of coconut mixed into a caramel made from coconut milk and bourbon with flourishes of melted chocolate and more caramel.
First, we make our chocolate filling, make a caramel sauce, toast our coconut, combine the sauce with coconut flakes and chill in the fridge. Next we crush Oreos up and press them into a pie pan, fill it with the pudding, roll out the coconut caramel mixture and place it on top of the chocolate filling. Finally, we cover it in more coconut and drizzle caramel and melted chocolate on it. Ta dah!
You can make this in one go, but it’s much more relaxing to give it a few days because you need to refrigerate your components. This is a great pie to freeze and bring over to a friend’s pie contest and win an award.
1 lb silken tofu (one package)
13 oz bittersweet chocolate (recommended supermarket brand: Ghirardelli, fancy brand: Valrhona)
½ cup of coconut cream
1 teaspoon of coconut extract
Coconut Caramel Sauce:
1 can of coconut cream (Chill the can in the fridge overnight without disturbing)
2 cups of brown sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 tbsp of bourbon
1 tbsp large flaked sea salt
1 cup of sweetened shredded coconut
1/2 cup of unsweetened flaked coconut
½ a standard (18 oz) box of Oreos
3 tablespoons of coconut oil
½ cup of unsweetened coconut flakes
¼ cup of chocolate chips
¼ cup of reserved caramel sauce
Step 2: Chocolate Filling
If you have not had tofu based chocolate pudding before, the filling might be mentally confusing. Don't get weirded out! It is pure magic. If you don’t trust me on this magic, then rest assured it has been vouched for by Mark Bittman and Alton Brown. Proof:
Melt your chocolate on a double boiler. Bring a couple of inches of water to a simmer in a medium pot. Place a mixing bowl over it. Add the chocolate chips and let it melt. Give it a few stirs to incorporate all the chocolate chips. (You can microwave it too, but it's tricky for me because my microwave is the size of a...I dunno, toaster, I guess.)
Once all the chips have melted, remove the bowl from the heat and add your tofu and coconut extract. Blend with an immersion blender. You could also use a blender, food processor or mixer.
Taste it. See if you want it to have a pinch of salt. The rest of the pie is super sweet , so you want this chocolate filling to be the opposite of that for balance.
Refrigerate until needed. (Keeps for several days.)
Step 3: Caramel Sauce
The caramel sauce is to be used in the caramel topping and as a caramel drizzle. Which is the reason, I've been informed, that Snoop Lion carries an umbrella.
Separate the coconut cream from the coconut water by opening the chilled can of coconut milk upside down and scooping the solid cream out. (You can reserve the watery liquid to use in a curry or another recipe, it freezes fine.)
In a heavy pot, melt your brown sugar over medium heat. Watch carefully so it does not burn, you are looking for a deep amber color (about ten minutes.) Take it off the heat and stir in of the thickened coconut cream, a healthy dose of salt and your bourbon. I reserved a quarter cup of this sauce in a smaller cup for drizzling, and the rest of it, I chilled to use in the coconut caramel topping
I did not use a thermometer with this. To test the caramel, I dipped a toothpick in the sauce and then cold water several times as the sauce got browner, looking out for a soft, chewy texture.
I wish I had made twice as much of this to keep on hand, as the results made me feel like this vegan caramel was superior even to caramel made with my very best friends, cream and butter.
Step 4: Toast Your Coconut
Raise your oven rack to the highest level.
Preheat oven at 350.
On a silpat lined baking sheet (you could use wax or parchment paper) spread out a full cup of both kinds of coconut.
Bake about 7-8 minutes. Watch closely, and remove from oven when the unsweetened coconut is brown through most of the flakes. The sweetened coconut will not brown as quickly as the unsweetened. This is good. You want a medley of nutty flavors from the toasting and flat, sweet coconut goodness mixed together.
Step 5: Samoa Layer
Add all of the white sweetened coconut and about half of the toasted non-sweetened coconut into your caramel. Reserve the other half of the non sweetened coconut for garnishing.
Microwave the caramel for ten seconds if it is too cold to stir.
Place the ball of coconut caramel between two layers of saran wrap.
Roll/Press it out with rolling pin until you get a disc that will roughly fit the top of your pie pan.
Store this coconut caramel disc until needed. Do not eat all of it and pretend you only made a chocolate pie. As if!
Step 6: Oreo Crust
Crush your Oreos in a gallon ziplock bag. I used about 25 Oreos and a rolling pin. Smash! CRUSH!
This is fun, but it is also easy to burst the bag. I left a tiny gap at the seal for air to escape so it would not pop.
Eat some Oreos.
Mix in your coconut oil. You can do this directly in the pie pan.
Press the crushed Oreos into your pie pan. Eat some more Oreos.
Step 7: Assemble Pie!
Give your chocolate filling a quick stir to ensure it is spreadable.
Using a rubber spatula, spread a nice, dense even layer. Fill the pie crust to the very top. Smooth it out the best you can.
Place you Samoa coconutastic disc of caramel on top of your chocolate filling.
Step 8: Garnish
Microwave the 1/4 cup of caramel you set aside for about 30 seconds so that it is pourable. Using a spoon or squeeze bottle, drizzle it on your pie. This will give a sticky surface for the coconut to adhere to.
Cover the surface of your pie with the rest of your toasted coconut.
Melt a 1/4 cup of chocolate chips. I did it in ten second bursts in the microwave and kept stirring in between until it was all melted.
You could drizzle it on your pie with a spoon, but just for fun I tried out making a paper cone out of a triangle of parchment paper and drizzling it out from the tip of the cone (like an ice cream cone shape) It worked great!
Drizzle more caramel. More! That's enough.
You should refrigerate this for at least an hour before serving in order for the slices to keep their shape.
Step 9: Win Pie Awards
You are now ready for the final stage, pie padawan... piedawan.
Enter pie in pie contest. I won best sweet pie and best non-traditional crust. You will also win all the awards your pie qualifies for.
This is an award-winning pie. It was strategically made just for a pie contest. What kind of pie would be ludicrous enough that it would guarantee a win? Perhaps one that referenced a popular, much-loved cookie? Maybe it would also have hyper-trending salted caramel but one-up that with something going on. It would definitely need to be chocolate, everyone loooooves chocolate. And, it needed to be vegan- in order to not forego even a single vote in the contest. Not one!
"Victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win."
This was the best pie, of course, but even if it wasn't, it may have won anyways. I spoke a bit too loudly about how awesome this pie was going to be, and how I was going to win. The votes were unanimous. I suspect everyone voted for my pie because it would have been awkward otherwise.
Just making this pie makes you a winner though, even without a contest. That's right. A winner is you!