My 8 year old daughter told me to call it that. And so it was! She's got taste.
I can't thank you enough for posting these detailed instructions. It worked exactly as you described. Also "..Cameras are out. Smell is intoxicating. Supreme adulation of friends and family within your grasp..' and "..Save the cheek and the crispiest piece of skin for yourself. Rejoice.." is literally exactly what happened. Awesomeness all around.