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July change of plans... Answered

There has been a change of plans for me:  because of the recent "purchase" of the portion of the company I work for, and my future being made so uncertain by this, I have had to cancel out my trip to NYC.  The uncertainty of it all, has placed undue toll on my being, and anxiety had become the only thing I have been feeling lately.

I just wanted you all to know, those that care about such things. 

For those that can be in NYC on June 16-19, the information about the conference can be found Here, at this link

Maybe in 2 years, when the next one comes along....



That, er "stinks".
I hope you can go next time

IF there is a next time,  if I survive until the next time, and if I am any better off then I am now.....next time....yeah, maybe.

Of course you will! Come on, that's two years. I'm guessing 1/30th of your life? That's not that much to be honest...

Good luck in the mean time!

Kryptonite, it can take as little as 5 minutes to stop breathing, for the heart to stop, for a truck to run over a person.....there are no guarantees in life...and although I will most likely be alive,  will I still be ambulatory enough to go? It's hard to say, with my heart and back problems that came up last year, etc.

.  Dude! Get off your pity pot. Sure, not being able to go is a big disappointment, but you still have a good life. I've got arthritis, bad back, bad heart, &c, &c, &c, ad nauseum, but I still live in the greatest country on earth, have a better standard of living than the vast majority of ppl in the world, and I have my friends and acquaintances on Ibles (plus much, much more) - just like you.
.  Use the time you would have spent at the conference to fall in love with Mrs. Goodhart again. Or complete some of those Ibles you are working on. Or volunteer at a local non-profit. Anything but feel sorry for yourself.
.  PS: I also suffer from Depression, so I realize it ain't as easy as "just smile and everything will be OK." But I have found that reminding myself just how lucky I have been (and am) really helps a LOT.

Well, with the possibility of being asked to leave a job I have been at for over 23+ years...and suddenly realizing that (after a little research) the job I have is one of the fastest shrinking jobs in the USA.....everyone is automating it, and operators are no longer required.....it isn't so much I feel sorry for myself....I am being filled to overflowing with anxiety and tension....I just barely make my bills now,  and the prospect of having to start ALL OVER at my age.....it is just so overwhelming....

It isn't so much about the conference.....although that does greive me greatly,  it is about WHY I can't go....this being up in the air about my job....the need to retrain for another skill....the need to do it VERY quickly...and not having the finances to do it with.....hopefully I can get a few grants to help with some schooling or something....

.  OK. Let's suppose you do lose your job:
.  You will probably receive some kind of severance package. It won't be much, but it should get you by for at least a month (with 23 yrs of service, they may be much more generous).
.  Hopefully they will provide medical insurance for a few months and then allow you to pick up the policy on your own. Not cheap, but better than trying to get a new insurance policy after having heart surgery. With Obamacare on the horizon, this may become a moot point soon.
.  If you haven't found a job after a few weeks, you will be eligible for unemployment. Not a lot of money, but it should be enough to keep a roof over your head and food on the table. You may have to cancel cable service and go to a slower Internet plan, but you can get by until you can find a new job.
.  Will it be fun? Nope. Will you have to lower your standard of living for a while? Probably. Will you survive and find another job? I got $100 says you will. Ain't America great?
.  PS: If worse comes to worst, with your heart, back, &c, you probably qualify for disability. Not a lot of money, but enough to live on. You can make taschengeld by fixing computers and other odd jobs for cash.
.  PPS: What will worrying get you? More heart problems, ulcers, sleepless nights, high blood pressure ... and it won't fix anything.

be eligible for unemployment. Not a lot of money, but it should be enough to keep a roof over your head

Since our (wife and my ) expenses (debts) now bring us to Zero or below a day or so after each pay, there is little solace in anything less then what I am making.  I have been here before, and I would prefer not to go bankrupt again.

On lowering my standard of living.....I did an on line search, and the rent I pay is probably around $300+  LESS than ANYONE in the area.  My wife's insistence on moving has been stymied because of this....we can't afford more, and there is no "less"

What will worrying get me?  Nothing, but it is not completely under my control.  Even before all this came about, I was anxious and nervous most of the time......now it is just 10 x worse.

But not all is doom and gloom.....

Here is the deal though,  I "may" have some time to get some training in something else.....it has to be a skilled type of work....since nothing will happen before June, and since even an immediate working on conversion to automation (something we doubt but are thinking could happen), there may be quite some time for me to get SOMETHING under my belt....IF  I can decide on what I would like to do.   Computer operators though, are going away fast it seems.

You could always sell off the least important things to get by, like movies(if you really want to watch movies, you can find them online, no pirating needed)

They make a great hiding place for a mini cam too, if one is into spying ;-)

I just meant there are a lot less VHS players around then just a few years ago

Yes, which is why modding them as cases would be cool and potentially worthwhile.

PS:  I really am not looking for pity or anything,  just wanted to let everyone know I will still be around in July, barring any further "incidence"

and that I am just so tire of it all anymore.

.  It has been pointed out to me that my posts seem a bit harsh. Let me assure you that my intent was not to insult you or make light of your problems. I'm just trying to show you that, while things are certainly not good for you right now, we live in a society that makes getting through rough spots like this much easier than it is in many other parts of the world.
.  Keep your chin up and remember that we are here to help if needed. You will survive!

" Let me assure you that my intent was not to insult you or make light of your problems."

I know Nacho....I guess I am looking for suggestions....almost anything...since I have not done this for nearly 25 years, and the "market"  and methodology have all changed while I worked happily away in my hamster cage....

I was ignoring the signs the REAL WORLD was giving me, and let this "situation" drop in on me.  So it IS my fault in a way.

I already have one interview at a local college (which is probably WAY too expensive, but one I have no idea WHAT to bring with me i.e. "what is a TRANSCRIPT?") and one possible one with a Technical Institute of Technology.  I will be planning for the most probable end of things, and if it never changes, but the economy does, who knows?  I may choose to change to a more skilled job ANYWAYS.  I think it might alleviate some of my anxiety.

I just meant that NONE  OF THIS HELPS my anxiety now.....no matter how well set I get with plans.....it all started in Jan.  not one week ago when I got notice the company was being sold.  This new thing has only added to whatever is causing me to feel that ole  "fight or flight" anxiety that I had years ago.

.  My biggest suggestions are to keep  your chin up, keep telling yourself that it's not the end of the world, and remember that we are here for you. Going to school is ALWAYS a good idea.

> what is a TRANSCRIPT?
.  Remember all those things the teachers said would "go on your permanent record, young man"? Your transcript is that permanent record. Yes, there really is one! Mainly a list of the courses you took and the grades you got. You should be able to get a copy from the last school you attended.
.  We are waaaayyyyyy too much alike. Shortly after my heart surgery I started having anxiety attacks. I found that deep-breathing exercises helped a lot. If the anxiety is getting that bad, you may want to get some anxiolytics (eg, Valium) from your doctor. I don't recommend them for long-term use, but they can work wonders short-term while trying to get everything in one pile. My attacks eventually subsisted.

Doesn't "keeping my chin up" make it easier for them to punch me out?  ;-)

Thanks, I  will have to check my school and see if they have records that go back before the computer age....

Deep breathing makes me dizzy  :-p

I may have to go back on the Lexipro again....they are definitely a long term type pill, they can take up to 2-4 weeks to become fully effective.

My  "night time" visits to the room will have to all but cease,  just because I don't know who's watching anymore.

I hate change that is just for the sake of change !

The way things look ,  it's not going to arrive at all....

not to pry, but what exactly is it that you "do"? i work in an industry that's being more and more automated every day (automotive manufacturing) so i know the drill (though i've got a pretty safe job being the IT guy, really hard to automate "printer unjamming").

I am (from what I have heard and read) one of the last dinosaur do all, watch all computer operators that work at night.  We had, at one time, a day shift, second shift and a third shift.  Then the day shift was eliminated and the 2nd and 3rd kept...for awhile.  Then the third shift was terminated as we had the operator do more and more, and the computers got faster. 

Now, many MANY shops have so called "lights out" operations:  no need for any human intervention except when the system has some power or component problem, and then the system itself calls someone.   Granted, this will take SOME TIME to get set up...nearly everything I do, has various parameters and such that are entered or checked by me, before executing a job.  It takes me nearly a full 8 hours each night to accomplish everything I have to do. 
Now, since they are going more and MORE paperless,  backing things up electronically, and such, they would not need an operator.  Just someone that can put paper in a printer now and then, for bill printing.....but wait,  we do "THAT OFFSITE" so they wouldn't even need to have someone do that. . .


yeah the position of "system watcher" is going out the door pretty quick. there are so many automated systems these days that having someone to monitor anything is pretty pointless.

we've got an ungodly amount of automation here. most of our lines are run by one person, as early as 10 years ago the same lines would have taken a minimum of 5 people to do the same job AND they would have made less product in the same period of time.



 wait, wait, wait....regular group hug, I did not want to get engaged...
but may apply in the State of California, your mileage may vary

Not wanting to miss out on this opportunity of joining this show of kindness, I also join in this group hug. But you must know, originally I was planning on turning the music way up and slowly waving a lit lighter in the air to show my support, bit plans change.

Thanks guys....it is disappointing, but the job I've been at for nearly a quarter of a century, may be going down the toilet too,  and that is what has me the most concerned at the moment....but I am working on finding another skill set to build on and maybe start a career in....something not so volitile as operations...

Maybe have your own business on the side, like selling stuff on ebay or craigslist, you could even make your own website and advertise it here a little(I bet plenty of people here would pay for whatever it might be).

I have looked into "running a business", even a VERY small one, and I just don't think I could do it. 

If all I needed to do was build things and sell them, that would be great,  but the accounting and tax collection, etc. etc. would drive me bonkers.

 *wants to get in on this grouphug*

*inserts self in the middle of the man-group-hug*

Ah... Times are hard... Hope you make it pal.

It does appear that, at the age fo 51, I will have to "start ALL over again",  learn a new skill through course work or college or something.....I am just SOOO tired anymore though.  You struggle for nearly 25 years at a place and they "automate" you right out the door.

Thanks for the encouragement though :-) 

 Thats terrible. I know how excited you where to finally be going. Hope all goes well with the job and your health so you can go in two years. 

Good Luck!

The job is probably going to be eliminated, and in the not too distant future...I just need to get my tail going and learn a new skill set.....something worthwhile....

So sorry to hear that Mike, I know you were really looking forward to going.  My prayers for your situation go out. Lyn

It really hits home since the last time, 2 years ago, I was unable to go because of heart surgery....and now this?  I'm a bit of a nervous wreck since I have discovered that my "job" happens to be one of the fastest "shrinking" jobs available in the USA.  

That's a shame...

Yeah, it is really weighing heavily on me, but the anxiety the cost would have incurred with my position being up in the air and all....well, for my sanity, I just had to drop it....again.
Each time (every two years) it seems to be harder for them to bring it all together....and I  am not so certain I  will be able to go (physically) in 2 years.