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Jury Duty Answered

I'm bummed, I have jury duty Monday. I really wouldn't mind being on a jury except for a few reasons.. It's the first day of summer session. It's compulsory. It's a form of indentured servitude. and most importantly, I really believe much of the laws in existence now are unjust. Oh well, I'll go, and try to avoid getting charged with contempt.


There are, I believe, ways and means of getting off. Don't they interview prospective jurors to select a "fair" jury in the US?

Try exhibiting wildly-biased opinions when they quiz you - hang all jay-walkers, chain women to the kitchen sink, <ethnic group X> are all criminals etc. Play it right, you could be home before the rest of them walk into the court.

I've never done jury duty myself, which is a good thing - there are certain classes of criminal I'd be too likely to dish out instant justice to, rather than wait for the lawyers to finish playing trumps with technicalities.

he problem with that is you tread the thin line between getting out of jury duty and going to jail for contempt for trying to get out of jury duty. I'm going to tell the truth, I spent five years working in the same building as the Mounted Patrol, I'll follow the judges instructions up to the point that they conflict with my conscience, and I don't believe that a conviction can be made without concrete physical evidence, testimony and eyewitness accounts are not good enough to send someone to prison. I'll let ya'll know how it goes.;-)

Then don't complain about jury duty We tried to bail you out but someone doesn't want to be forced to say their racist


But a great idea nonetheless!

i seem to recall a story about a german who did that to avoid serving in the army. he originally planned to build a canoe though.

Pretty anticlimatic but here is how it went down: Got there early to get breakfast at a nearby shop because you don't know when you will get a chance to eat or be able to go out. I had packed a few days worth of newspapers I haven't gotten a chance to read, the free daily papers I picked up at the subway entrance, a book and a writing pad to keep occupied. They said Wifi was available but what good is it when the laptop battery is only good for a few hours and you can't plug in. Got at the courthouse 8AM early to get pass the security check. Make sure your pants don't drop when you need to take off your belt going through the metal detector. Summons was to be there at 8:30. Clerk came in around 8:50 to show us a movie made with taxpayer money on how jury duty works. Ed Bradley and Diane Saywer from TV journalism fame narrated. It did show US legal system is based on English legal system and we screwed it for the King by messing up his expected outcome with Peter Zenger on trial for freedom of the press. "You cannot hang the jury." It did have a cool scene of "trial by ordeal-drowning". The clerk then started grouping us by people with different reasons to be excused. Yes, everyone looked at the group that got up when the clerk said "If you do not speak English go to the second door on my left..., and If you have been convicted of a felony..." I do not know why they got grouped together. I fell into the parents group caring for children under 14. It seems every county clerk has to be a warm-up comedian. We get herded into another room to have a clerk give a lecture on that you may be a hardship case but that only gets you a postponement to serve if you provide the proper proof for your excuse. I was ready to serve and get it over with since I had already rescheduled everything to be there. I could return back to the central waiting room. So it was wait, wait, wait. Around noon I was getting hungry and decided it might be a good time to sign out to go get lunch. Then the ominous voice over the loudspeaker announced my name with a bunch of others. We get herded into the next room. Yay, we were getting out release papers. I didn't even get a chance to get grilled by lawyers. So, hopefully they shouldn't call me back until it is 6 to 8 years. Unless you volunteer.

It is my turn on the morrow. I think is is criminal court.

We will deal out justice the Instructables way, because that's how we roll... sound too rough?

No way out...I post my story in the evening.

I have a friend that went for Jury Duty and he was led to a man who was in shackles and locked to an eye bolt in the floor. The officer asked my friend what he thought and he told them "He's guilty, you don't chain an innocent man like that". He was immediately dismissed.

Hello: Salaam (same in arabic) Goodbye: Khodahafez (usually shortened to khodafez)

French was supposed to learn spannish but got extra French hebrew bit of binary dos suse

I don't know 1337, but I think I figured out what you guys said (traslated into english): LinuxH4x0r: I speak 1337 Labot2001: Me too Am I right? And could you teach me 1337?

HA! That's funny, I wasn't tring to make that a link, I just put a [ before the 001 to spell "cool" in 1337(a.k.a. leet). That's funny! LOL

I speak a little spanish. And I took chinese lessons a while back, so I know a few words. And a few words of French and Russian rounds it out...

Hey! Salaam! Is Farsi very similar to Arabic, then?

Similar. Its the same alphabet (arabic has 4 letters less) and a lot of the sord roots are the same. But besides that its completely different,

First thing to do when you get into court: Take a good hard look at the criminal and say "He's totally guilty."

YEA!!!! It's over I'm giddy, I haven't slept in days I've been dreading this so much. So here's what went down. I got there at 7:30 to avoid the line at the security theater. Checked in sat for an hour. They swore us in (by God) to which I answered "I so affirm". Judge comes in to hear hardship pleas, I got in line, woman in front of me asks "Can I get out because I have school?" When the judge stopped laughing (no I'm not kidding) I said "Nevermind, your honor" and sat down. Four judges, 1-4 cases each about 250 jurors, some misdemeanors so that's only 6 jurors , I start figuring the odds are pretty good I won't get picked I sit, people get called. 11:30 lunch be back at 1:15 I'm back, they say there are two trials left. I miss the first one. Then 1:45, She starts calling names, dammit she called me, along with 2/3 of the pool, that's a bad sign, means they need 12 jurors, and they think a lot will be excused. I go into my "hostile /deceptive act" frown, avert eyes, hands clenched into fists in pockets. We line up outside the courtroom and the clerk comes out and says the three sweetest words ever "You are dismissed".

No comperende english senor! Fake having really bad english.

The rest of the community will put you on trial for no habla espanol or having really bad spanish. :)

Most of them shudder at the though of Spanish. English speaking jerks all of em....

My theory is the more you try to avoid being summoned, the greater your chances of being called. If you exhibit any logical behavior and say you cannot be swayed emotionally in a trial, your chances of getting picked for an actual trial is smaller. Mention you know people in law enforcement or related positions. Bring a big book to read. I don't think they allow electronic devices in the waiting room.


10 years ago

I've been called up for "Jury duty" perhaps a half-dozen times, most of which consisted of sitting in the waiting room for the lawyers to decide whether they were going to need any jurors that day. The day I had food poisoning was especially ... entertaining. (it's better now than it used to be; the last couple of times they have decided by before reporting-time that they wouldn't need me.) Only once did I get as far as an actual selection panel. That was for a DUI case, and after my expression of honest doubts about alcohol vs other factors in driving ability, they decided they didn't want me...