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Me asking for girl advice, who wouda thought eh? Answered

I'm not one to ask forumers for girl advice because normally everyone gives "hollywood" advice, but I'm in a jam and don't know who else to ask. I have a girlfriend, believe it or not and Christmas is coming fast. I have nothing for her and no solid ideas. I have a couple really good ideas but I can't pull them off. she asked me for a blender, she seems really serious about it but obviously I can't wake up Xmas morning and feel good about a blender....... covering my bases I got one just so she can't be pissed I didn't get her one...... but I need a main gift. Also, her birthday is on the 28th of December.....this is the first gift giving occasion I have been with her and I have 2 in a row....... infact this is the first time in a good 5 years I cared enough about a girl not to break up with her before a holiday just to avoid gift giving (ya, I know....I'm a prick) my other problem is this........ after only knowing me for about a month my birthday came along........ she went out and tracked down my most prized possession that I foolishly pawned as a teenager.......I had to pay my rent ....... i was 18 and pawning my 5 string Gibson epiphone reverse headstock bass was my only option. she found it in a different pawn shop in town and paid quite a lot of money for it.......... for a guess....... I got a little over $500 for it when I pawned it....... and pawnshops usually double or triple the price tag in there store........ my guess is she paid close to a grand for it. for Christmas she got me concert tickets, a remote control helicopter and something else I don't know about. also for valentines day she bought executive box seats for a licolin park concert (she had to tell me about the concerts so I could take the time off work....) I am not a rich man...... I make a few bucks........ but I'm not loaded........... I have no clue what to get her. some of the ideas I did have were: 1. redo her condo...... paint fix stuff up ...... kinda extreme makeover but not so extreme....... this is something I know would make her happy but I have no idea how to get her out of her condo for 2 days without her knowing whats gong on. 2. book a cruise or all expenses paid vacation........ but like I said I'm not a rich man.......so I'll have to like.....put a down payment on it and then like....... give her the receipt for x-mas and go like 6 months later........ but I don't know if thats stupid or what? the only other thing I can think of is like.......... random junk like the blender and maybe some other crap so she has a few things to open on christmas that she likes and or needs and then take her out for dinner for her B-day and give her a diamond necklace........ but I hate buying jewelry for chicks. I must get 2 separate gifts for her because in conversation she has mentioned how people give her stuff and are like happy b-day / x-mas and she hates it......she also hates b-day presents wrapped in x-mas paper. I know she'd be happy if I gave her a pack of gum from the corner store......she's not materialistic or high maintenance........ but I feel like I have to do something nice and special for her? any idea's? keeping in mind I'm not a rich man


I agree with goodhart. Except add this twist. Put a card in the blender that leads her to another card, which leads her to another card, etc. etc. The final card leads her to a nice present such as a necklace or whatever. Then take her out for dinner. I wish i had a girlfriend. _

As long as she doesn't try the blender before she looks in it...

If you are using the vitamix you can probably blend coconut rind LOL

Ok, that's 15 minutes of research time I will never get back LOL Thanks Kiteman for pointing out what he meant though, I would never have guessed. :-)

Hah, I was trying to figure out what you meant :P

The Vita-mix has such a powerful motor it can knead bread dough.

Yeah, I was going to suggest getting her one of those 'Will It Blend?' blenders. I think as an Instructabler, you could feel good about giving a gift with so much experimental possibility and destructive power. That, or cunnilingus, for like, a day...

haha. i was thinking of maybe making a collaboration on how to perform cunnilingus, but figured it might get some people mad. but, if you want to make that collab, just pm me.

LOL. I wonder if, as the owner of a Y chromosome, I'm qualified... You can find lots of opinion pieces on that topic on craigslist. Interesting stuff... but hardly a unified set of instructions. It seems women have different likes and dislikes. Weird.

i never thought of that - different likes and dislikes. well, when it comes to qualifications... how does one become "qualified"? what makes someone qualified to instruct on this. i wonder...

That is a good idea. I have actually done that for my wife, the few times I have been home by myself while she was elsewhere.


10 years ago

I hope it's a Blendtec blender

Hmm, being from an "old school" mindset (which will probably not be very helpful to you), how about the blender with something "special in it or made in it" ?

Or a super blender, back when I was a bit younger, these Vita-mix blenders cost around $100, now look at them LOL but what a blender ! Maybe a used one can be had for a lot less (mine is hardly ever used, but I wouldn't give it up too easily).

Oh man.... My parents got a Vita-mix blender about a year ago... It is so freaking sweet!

We got one of those. We were chopping cleaning veggies for a veggie soup one day (add veggies, add warm tapwater and blend - the speed of the blades will heat up the soup to boiling temperature!), and one of us had accidentally left a kitchen knife in the blender - bye-bye kitchen knife!! We had a nice cartoon-like Z-shaped piece of twisted metal, and a *lot* of extra fiber in the soup from the wooden handle...

The Vita-mix, of course, was fine.

** will it blend? ** yes LOL

I need something awesome......... I'm looking for like.......a Christmas miracle type solution here. this is what I have in my corner: 1. I'm smart as fu$K 2. I'm not afraid of hard work 3. I don't have a ton of cash to blow I think I need an idea that incorperates DIY and supply purchase. I need that blow her away idea

Wire your brain up to hers so you can communicate telepathically. ...you said you were smart as "fu$K"... which I think means you're really smart, not sure though ;-) ...too hard!? Do something with LEDs... 500 - 5K LEDs usually means something ;-)

5K LEDs... yeah... i would be asking myself "are we done yet?" "how about now?"


10 years ago

Buying large-ticket items you're not sure she'd be into is dangerous, as is redoing her condo as a surprise.

However, agreeing to make/do/buy something for her then letting her have a hand in the result is perfectly safe. This would work particularly well for the condo rehab.

I'd also stay out of the gift price inflation game. Once you start it's hard to quit, and you don't want that to become the expectation.

However, agreeing to make/do/buy something for her then letting her have a hand in the result is perfectly safe. This would work particularly well for the condo rehab.

I second that motion. The consequences of the incorrect color could be disastrous - even if it's the "right" color :/ :p

Here's a novel idea: a perfect man doll, she can measure you by:
link to a perfect man doll....

When you squeeze his tummy he says 6 different phrases such as:

  • "Here you take the remote as long as I am with you I don't care what we watch."
  • "You know honey why don't you just relax and let me make dinner tonight."
  • "Ahh can't your mother stay another week"
  • "The ball game really isn't that important I'd rather spend time with you."
  • "Let's just cuddle tonight"
  • "Actually I am not really sure which way to go, I'll turn in here and ask directions."

nice thought..... but you just described my relationship. 1. I rarely watch TV.... and whatever I miss I can catch on the net 2. I like to cook, and so does she. our problem is that we fight over the kitchen. we evenly divide days of the week to cook so we both get fair chances to cook 3. She hates being around her mother for more then a couple hours..... I don't mind her at all 4. although I love sports.... I find watching them on TV incredibly boring... I go to live games once in a while..... and i buy a pro line ticket maybe twice a season for football and thats the only time I care to watch 5. my girlfriend is a nimphomaniac, I'm usually the one to suggest "cuddling" just to give the boys a break 6. I know my way around the city I live like i designed it..... if I'm going somewhere I've never been I mapquest even if I'm pretty sure I know where it is...... if I'm lost....I hate wasting time traveling.... I'm the first to suggest asking directions if need be not on your list but another point..... i was raised by a single mother.... I instinctivly put the toliet seat down, I haven't left it up in a good 15 years..... even living on my own I put it down.

if you are good with words, i recommend a poem. girls always seem to love it when i wrote them poems especially if you include a metaphor with the gift in the poem.


10 years ago

I'm too lazy to read that entire post... so I'm just going to tell you to stab her in the face, or something... Stab her in face or something....

Make something from the heart. I'm making my girlfriend a ring for X-mas out of wood from a branch of my tree in my back yard.


10 years ago

Just because she can afford to give you expensive gifts, don't feel obligated to give her equally expensive gifts back. If it's out of your price range, it's out of your price range, and that's just something you guys are going to have to learn to live with.

Two options: (1) tell her you're not comfortable with her giving you such expensive presents, because you can't afford to reciprocate, or (2) give her something that doesn't break the bank, but that will have a lot of emotional significance for her.

Are you handy? Can you cook? Do you make art? Are you good at organizing things? Cooking a nice dinner or something with that blender would be an obvious one. Build her a website. Sculpt her face from a picture. Enroll the two of you in dance classes - or blacksmithing classes - whatever her "I've always wanted to do that" thing is. Buy her some lingerie (provided she's not hung up on brand names). Give her a pack of IOU cards ("Good for one backrub", "Good for one session of my sexual fantasy", "Good for one movie of my choosing", "Good for one home-made dinner", etc... - pick things you'll both enjoy).

Another option is asking her close friends or family what *they* think she would like. Be careful with this one though - they may be *way* off. :-D

Good luck!

I think that the best option would be to do both 1 & 2.

do a romantic trip to Napa Valley (wine tasting ans stuff)...not much of a suggestion, or make her something from instrucables


10 years ago

well, chaoscampbell, i'm going to ask you to practice what you preach - break up with her. actually, i'm just kidding. you'll think of something - she obviously knows YOU pretty well, so you probably know her better than you think. a cruise is expensive, but maybe a small trip somewhere for like three-four days? by the way, me and my girlfriend are still together, and coming up on six months in a long distance relationship, even though you prophesized doom. anyway, good luck with your current dilemma. you'll think of something.

wow, that's a tough situation. I don't know if you want to redo her condo because what if she likes how it is, or she doesn't like what you did to it, it's either a mega win or an extreme lose.