Introduction: Bacon Placemats

Instructlobians like bacon. Bacon Soap, Bacon Image Tiles, Bacon and some other stuff sandwiches etc.

The next logical step is, naturally, bacon textiles. So get ready for an all body lube job. After all, cholesterol is fat, and fat is slippery. Lets lube those (heart) valves :)

Step 1: Ingredients and Tools

You will need

1 Package of sliced Bacon (at least 12 slices) -- any bacon will do, even blasphemous turkey bacon.
1 Baking Sheet
Butter
Foil
Paper towels
Plate

Hunger for Bacon

Step 2: Foil and Grease

Foil your baking sheet/pan -- then apply a little butter (this gets the cooking process going until some fat renders off the bacon).

Step 3: Weaving

Now is a good time to preheat your oven to 400oF

Weave using an over/under pattern making a 6X6 matrix. Make it as tight as possible with minimal overlap. If your bacon strips have a wider side -- flip between wide and thin as you weave. This ensures your mat is not lopsided. Remember that bacon shrinks when cooked; this pulls the weave even tighter strengthening the structure.

Step 4: Bake

Bake in your preheated oven for about 20 to 30 minutes (depending on how crispy you like your bacon). Be conscious of your bacon and pull it out when it's done. It should turn that dark bacon color we all know and love.

Step 5: De Oiling

No, that's not slang to "The oiling" -- remove your bacon from the oven. Then, using a spatula -- move to a paper towel covered plate. Then add some paper towels on top and gently press down to soak up more excess fats.

After a minute or so, change or flip your towels.


Now, if you want a stiffer mat. Allow the bacon to sit out for 10 minutes or so. You can then use your bacon as a roof for your hot dog log cabin.

You can also experiment with bacon shapes. Woven Bacon Bowls made with turkey bacon are indeed successful. And that was done in the microwave! If you want to experiment with shapes simple press your bacon mat onto the outside of a bowl or other mold while you let it stiffen. Then load it up with potatoes, toast, jam and eggs for your "tune-up breakfast."

Step 6: A Word About Bacon.....

Seriously, eating a whole bacon mat (1 package of bacon) on slices of toast is probably not a good idea.... Trust me, I know.

But it did look really cool on a toast hut using toasted bread joinery!

Comments

author
smartmiltoys (author)2015-02-24

As for me I love Bacon!

author
BruceE3 (author)2015-02-23

how would you season the bacon?

author
RobertGoldring (author)2014-08-20

very unique way of using bacon.

author
donkeyknee (author)2013-07-18

Its wonderful

author
contactscolored (author)2013-04-04

this is probobly the most epic pumkin i have ever seen.... ever

author
JensonBut (author)2013-01-25

this has got to be one of the coolest things from bacon i have ever seen! +1

author
DividersMaker (author)2013-01-18

mmmmmmm, bacon liquor...

author
eyejuice (author)2007-06-22

two words: bacon basket

author
bnutmeg (author)eyejuice2008-05-08

Aw, jeez. I accidentally got a bacon glove last winter. I ended up with a third degree burn covering my hand and forearm. Since I figured I'd be in the ER for a while, and I hurt myself while making breakfast, I brought the cooked bacon along, which reaaaalllly disturbed the ER staff.

author
bnutmeg (author)bnutmeg2008-05-29

Like one what, Punkguyta? How about trying for an insult that make grammatical sense, huh?

author
trebuchet03 (author)bnutmeg2008-05-29

Like one what, Punkguyta? How about trying for an insult that make grammatical sense, huh?

Irony...

I should just have this entire section of the thread deleted - and really, attacking one's grammar for personal gain is always a lose-lose situation. This is especially so when the attack itself is grammatically incorrect...

author
bnutmeg (author)trebuchet032012-05-23

In all seriousness, what do you see wrong with the grammar in my May 29th post?

Also, it was most certainly not "for personal gain". What do I have to gain? A stranger insulted me. My original post is neither "dumb" nor made up, as Punkguyta suggests.

Did you start with "Irony..." to indicate the irony of you getting involved in this back-and-forth just to say you are above such things?

author
trebuchet03 (author)bnutmeg2012-05-23

You have responded to a post from May 29, 2008 - nearly 3 years old... Did the instructables robot send you a new comment email about this 3 year old post? If yes, let the dev team know by posting here.

author
Punkguyta (author)bnutmeg2008-05-08

No one is that dumb, so stop trying to be like one.

author
a7x92x (author)eyejuice2007-08-24

Bacon basket! even better, bacon gloves!

author
twistedgreen (author)2010-07-27

As  state in my profile, I DO like to fry bacon in the nude.....it lets me know that I AM ALIVE!!! lol  BACON is the BEST

author
viper64 (author)twistedgreen2012-01-23

cool

author
Doctor When (author)2008-02-15

potato skins in reverse! Bacon bowl with potatoes in it!

author
danbar (author)Doctor When2011-04-10

lol i definetively will work on that genius!!
as im mexican i will also include some "cecina enchilada"

author
RaNDoMLeiGH (author)Doctor When2009-02-28

oh god... YES!

author
Doctor When (author)RaNDoMLeiGH2010-02-21

 Isn't it wonderful?

author
red-king (author)Doctor When2009-08-26

you are a genius.

author
adamvan2000 (author)2010-05-20

-"any bacon will do, even blasphemous turkey bacon"

If turkey bacon is blasphemy, is a turducken the antichrist of bacon?

~adamvan2000

author
jonzo97 (author)adamvan20002011-04-10

Not if it is a bacon wrapped turducken.

author
drahcus (author)2011-04-09

If you need something even worse for your health try putting some brown sugar on top of the bacon before you bake it. :) The sugar melts and carmelizes the bacon

author
Screamo (author)2010-09-25

YUMM~!~!~!~!~!

author
mackc (author)2007-08-31

Bacon is more of a seasoning, like Gravy and Hard liqour.

author
RaNDoMLeiGH (author)mackc2009-02-28

hard liquor is a seasoning? Oh, I've been doing it all wrong. I thought hard liquor was the main course.

author
Subvert (author)RaNDoMLeiGH2009-08-25

All of the above can actually be the main course.

author
red-king (author)Subvert2009-08-26

especially bacon... and hard liquor too i guess...

author
trophywife (author)red-king2009-11-25

mmmmmmm, bacon liquor..........

author
red-king (author)trophywife2009-11-26

 sounds uh.... tasty... i guess... xD

author
adamvan2000 (author)red-king2010-05-20

I sooo see an instructable coming on bacon liquor.
~adamvan2000

author
trebuchet03 (author)adamvan20002010-05-20

Hrmm... I see there isn't an instructable on making bacon bourbon (which is delicious)...

author
trophywife (author)trebuchet032010-05-22

 here's one for bacon vodka. imagine the bloody marys..... mmmmmmmmmm

www.instructables.com/id/Bacon-Infused-Vodka/

author
Aleksandr Skotbot (author)2008-10-06

can I make one out of soy bacon? I hope so. (:

author

if turkey bacon is blasphemous, soy bacon must be at least a cardinal sin...

~adamvan2000

author
Colonel88 (author)2009-11-14

if Instructlobians like bacon then Instructlobians join mah group

https://www.instructables.com/group/bacon

author
tevers94 (author)2009-09-10

GENIUS!!!!!!

author
James (pseudo-geek) (author)2007-09-01

now why are you people so paranoid? one sheet of bacon isn't going to kill you, eating 2 sheets a day for 15 years probably would, but COME ON! ......yes, I know what I'm talking about, my mom is going to college for natural health. oh, and theres JUST AS MUCH cholesterol in that pork chop you ate the other day, as about 10 sheets of bacon. fat is fat, whether its melted into oil or not.

author

you are correct. however, bacon has a bit of a notorious reputation for being fatty, and thus being bad for you. it's quite common for people to think things like this.

author
schnerby (author)2007-06-23

For some odd reason I have never seen bacon that looks like this outside the deli when you specifically order 'streaky bacon'. Perhaps this is my mark as a foriegner...

author
neckfire (author)schnerby2008-02-28

Depending where you are from bacon has different definitions. American bacon comes from the under belly of the pig. If you want some "streaky bacon" go to a decent butcher and ask for American bacon- ask him to cut it thick from the slab. Then make some bacon bowls! (or mats, helmets, baskets, et al...) Happy baconing

author
red-king (author)neckfire2009-08-26

bacon shirt!

author
thunk (author)2007-11-28

I'm not happy. I just made one of these to use as a mouse-mat. I hoped that it would be low friction, and thus save my wrist from RSI. It was a disaster. First, as the mat isn't that smooth, so the ball doesn't always rotate. Next, the rollers inside the mouse got slippery, so that when the ball did turn, the rotation wasn't registered. Finally, a mouse nibbled the mat, and the oily mouse-wire overnight. "So what are you going to do?" I hear nobody ask. It's obvious - I'm off to buy an optical mouse.

author
monkeeeee001 (author)thunk2008-03-21

What!?

author
thunk (author)monkeeeee0012008-03-26

What exactly is your question ? Re-reading it now several months after writing it, I realize that there is a spare "as" in sentence 3, and perhaps is was not totally clear, that the nibbling mouse was small, gray and alive. "Was" here, rather than "is", and he didn't die of choked arteries caused by eating my mouse-mat. If you have anymore questions, please be more specific. Thunk

author
RaNDoMLeiGH (author)thunk2009-02-28

are you suggesting a bacon mouse pad?

author
thunk (author)RaNDoMLeiGH2009-03-01

When I wrote "It was a disaster", I was trying to communicate to potential readers, that a bacon mouse mat is not the best solution, at least not with a ball mouse. I also implied that a bacon mouse map could work better with an optical mouse. However, due to the infestation with real mice, I never got round to testing the theory. If you have an optical mouse, no problem with live mice, and some spare bacon, you could test the hypothosis and inform the rest of us here as to how well the combination bacon - optical mouse works, and perhaps a few words to the life-expectancy of the solution. Best regards.

author
red-king (author)thunk2009-08-26

it would be good for those long computer sessions when you get hungry...

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