Introduction: How to Leave School Early.

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About: A Northern Ireland based maker with a propensity to cause trouble and freshly constructed family.

Ok There was an 'ible posted but it covered one quite poor technique...

These are the tricks I learned from a school I hated a lot, I was caught the odd time, which is a good thing, it exposes the holes in your plans, making it harder to be caught the next time.

Also no school, no matter what is completely inescapable, some may be harder to fool, to the point where it's a waste of effort but it can always be done.

Also since photos are going to be difficult I'll do my best with one's on my computer and google...

Step 1: When Do You Want to Leave?

This is important to the whole thing, if you're planning on leaving between classes that's ok we'll cover that.

You need to pay attention to routine, you don't want to walk past the teachers break room window on your way out, more so you need to get an idea of what teachers are on patrolling where, in every school there are a few teachers on patrol, usually teachers that chose the job of doing that...

The older they are the better they are at it, new teachers are easier to get around, consider this in your plans, the longer a teacher has been at the school the better they will know all the wee tricks students do or did.

Step 2: Your Way Out...

Carefully consider your route out of the school and away from it, you don't want to be walking down the road in plain view of the teachers that may or may not be on duty, they can walk as well, they also wont hesitate to go get you...

The best areas to leave the school are usually the corners of the grounds, where you can go from a corner to the other side of the street and not have far to go before being out of view.

Other great places are those that have maybe a small gate with a side street or two close to them, even hopping the fence isn't the worst plan, you're actually much better off getting figured out afterwards than you are getting caught in the act, since it becomes a little more grey, when they can't be completely sure what was going on to start with.

Your way out should also be in the direction of where you're going, otherwise you'll have to backtrack around the school risking being caught on and you'll have to walk about more...

Step 3: Leaving at Break Time

Break time, in the morning when it's only around 15 minutes most places can be tight.

Does your school have prefects? Do they monitor the gates? If so having a big brother or friends big brother is good right about now. Other than that look about for prefects that are lazy or always late, getting out quickly before everyone else is about is probably the best way to do it.

Try and get straight out of your class and directly to the place your leaving by, walk calmly and quickly, so as not to get stopped for running or anything stupid like that.

When you see a clear entrance have a quick look about for any teachers or such, look to see if any are behind you, it's a schoolboy error but I've seen someone do it...

Coasts clear, walk off quickly and get out of view of the entrance and school, keep going until you're a bit away, for the meantime don't go to the closest shops, or use that route, teachers or prefects may be nipping out for their break/lunch.

Probably best you eat after your escape is over...

Step 4: Leaving at Lunch...

Lunchtime works similarly to leaving at break except for two things, first of all you have a lot more time to play with, getting out quickly is a good way to do it since people have to go get their lunch and this makes it harder to travel around the school, also the people on duty will be getting their lunch from somewhere...

However lunchtime also gives a better set options for leaving at the end of it, since it's longer you have time to walk about and still have an excuse for doing something.

Lunch is also a common time for people to have to leave for any appointments, walking out the gate like nothing is going on, calm and normal, should someone ask what you're doing turn round looking a bit confused and go what sir/miss, I have a doctors/dentists/family appointment/meeting keep the story very straight and simple, complicated lies are easy to trip up and less you're a good liar. Should the topic of notes come up search your pockets unfold all those bits of paper, shift things around looking for it, eventually look confused and spoof it, say I don't know where it is, can I bring it to you tomorrow morning. If the teacher is feeling in the mood to follow up then you have a whole day to make a forgery or come up with a way of doing something about it, just remember KISS Keep It Simple, Stupid

Another good way of walking straight up to the gate with a teacher there is take out your phone and pretend to phone a family member and in earshot say something like Yeah I'm leaving now, don't worry I wont be late. The teacher will immediately be concerned with the phones in school rule, so you'll have the time to explain that you were simply phoning a family member so they knew you were on your way to the (insert excuse place here).

By now you must be thinking I'm a nut job but with a little thought or if needs be a full scale military operation you can extricate yourself from learning things...

To give you an idea we once managed to get half of our year out of school, with noone's knowledge, this was no easy feat but nothing was said the next day, mainly because any parent would turn round and ask exactly how such a thing could happen.

Step 5: Leaving Between Classes.

There's a certain time between classes, depending on how the schedule works that basically every student in the school will be going somewhere, which is pretty handy for you. These times are perfect for leaving school, you just get lost in the fray.

During the last few periods of class some students will already be leaving if they have no more classes, this makes for an excellent opportunity, simply blend on in to the crowd.

Should it be earlier than that you will have to go at just the right time, when all hell is breaking loose you should be going to the closest exit that's not in the direction of your next class, so you don't bump in to the teacher on the way, if you suddenly see them walking towards you start hurrying, try not to be noticed but look like you're a bit bothered and keep shifting, explain the appointment excuse and that the previous class teacher wouldn't let you leave early for it...

If you can wrangle it right then use these times to your advantage by asking the teacher of the class before could you go a few minutes early for whatever cock and bull reason, if they're a softie explain that you need to go tot he toilet but the next teacher is really strict... You'll be gone just as it's all kicking off.



Step 6: The Great Escapes.

In large schools, especially ones with a mix of very old and new buildings it's quite easy to find little place that you can escape via.

It's always worth knowing the little places anyway, they can provide shelter from a missed homework, a hidey hole for a quick cigarette at break, an escape route...

Along the back of a school, note the existence of any alleys etc. there are often a number of entrance routes for the likes of rubbish removal and whatnot around there.

Another good point is that most fences aren't too serious around a school, if they're not high take a walk around the grounds one day, figuring out where would be a good place to go around.

Hell better yet call it a maths or geography project, take a meter roller and go around the perimeter of the grounds. Now it seems like bordering on crazy but I for one like to know about the places I visit every day.

large bushes and shrubberies are always an excellent place to slip away and an even better place to slip in to for a hidey hole on a nice day.

Any gate or entrance is also an exit.

Fire escapes present a handy way out, not so much out as up, our old school had a three foot thick wall about twenty foot high running up the back of it, it was an old school and the wall had been rebuilt in a lot of different ways, up a fire escape, on to the wall and down a lampost in the back alley... That kind of thing is a little extreme and is obvious behaviour if seen but is a surefire way to leave without being asked questions...

Step 7: Routines, Reasons and Alternatives.

Why are you skipping school? If it's for one class then cutting the whole day seems dumb...

If you do truly hate your school then speak to your parents about it, ask about moving schools, if that become an option, then tow the line and lick boot, get the grades then get out of there, a term's effort is better than a few years of a horrible school, why do you think I know this rubbish.

If you are skipping often and feel you have justified it to yourself then don't make it a routine that kind of behaviour and absences are very easy to notice, even to a rookie teacher, also doing it too much is a dead giveway. if you skipped two or three days in a week then stay in for a week or two, make it random, never choose a skip day it'll screw you right over...

You don't always have to skip the whole thing, if you're sneaking away to avoid handing something in, skip the class and avoid that teachers department, much easier than a whole day unless you can't avoid them.

If it's because of detention leave at the last possible moment, or just walk out of school as normal, act coy, should the teacher taking it or the one that gave you it pick you up then simply say you forgot or make an excuse added to I thought it was next week/tomorrow

Step 8: The Rest of the Stuff...

You'll probably have noticed that I have avoided anything about faking sick... It's a tried and tested means of failure, I had a distinct advantage of running hot anyway and a temperature is never enough, got swarthy skin? Even when you're sick they think you're fine... Throwing up, that right there is a trip to the nurse/sister/office for a cool drink of water and a sit/lie down. Followed by some long and boring calls, losing you the ability to escape the parents or being sent back to class.

Don't skip school just because you feel like it, that's pretty dumb, considering the fact that your education is of importance, wait until you get a job, a good one, then start pulling sickies...

Remember, and I am warning you because I have come close to the line before, You are running the risk of detention, suspension, expulsion, lecturing from parents, a bad job, lawful action upon both you and your parents. Skipping school shouldn't be taken lightly, it's playing with fire.

Burning Questions: Round 5

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Burning Questions: Round 5