Introduction: The Revised Zombie Survival "kit"

Due to the many flaws of my previous Instructable....
I have created a new and improved one...MWHUHUA!!!
I have pondered for a couple months, and i have decided That since the general public  doesn't know what the zombie virus's symptoms or what the zombies Behavior will be like, i will focus on what is important, informing people of how to survive Apocalypse or as i like to call it...
"When the Sh*t hits the fan"
Good luck zombie hunters... you'll need it...

Step 1: Some Guidlines Before We Begin......

you don't have to follow the following "rules" just remember that these "rules" are what keep you alive during W.T.S.H.T.F. day, hopefully.....

Rule #1 When the zombies "rise from the grave" don't leave your house.

Why? In the event of a zombie attack, theirs going to be lots of people that will loot stores and killing innocent people just so that they could have their belongings. you have a better chance of survival indoors rather then outside of your house.

Rule #2 Before the zombies attack, buy everything you'll need before hand.

Why? This is one of those rules that needs no explanation, but if i must i will tell you why...
YOU AREN'T GONNA FIND A  SHOTGUN AND A WHOLE CRATE OF AMMO IN THE MIDDLE OF APOCALYPSE!!!!!! The lies the directors of  the movie zombie-land made people believe that you can find almost everything you need on your own in apocalypse.
The truth is that the odds of finding a whole bag of military-grade firearms in the back of a H3 hummer is quite slim, this depends on how long time has passed after W.T.S.H.T.F. day.

Rule #3 if your on the go, pack light.

Why? Because if you don't pack light you will hinder your movement and this will make your journey longer and more dangerous, if you travel light, you'll shorten your estimated travel time and will be able to defend yourself when zombies or raiders attack.

Rule #4 learn everything you might want to know before hand

Why? Simply because its better to learn everything you can that will aid your survival!

Rule #5 Think before you do

Why? because if you don't, more then likely you'll end up zombie chow...

The next section will be on your "survivor type".

Step 2: How to Determine What Survivor Type You Are.

In this step i will list what you need to determine before you get on the road.

these are the different types of survivor according to me.

   1# Lone wolf

*Do you have experience/practice with military hardware, nuclear survival and trekking?

*Do you have very little or no attachments to anybody around you? 

* Do you have a way to keep you from going crazy? (video games do not count)

*Do you know your plan once you get their? (if you don't stick in a group)

*Do you know three or more martial arts? (martial arts aid in hand to hand combat)

    2#The Alpha

*Do you have skills in group leadership, firearms and traveling?

*Do you have a group of people consisting of 7 or more members?

 *Do you have people who have specialized jobs/talents in your group?

*Do you have a arsenal of weapons to arm your group?

*Does your team have specialized talents?

3#The deceiver

*Are you a lawyer?( if so, don't sue me...) do you have skills in bribery and taking advantage of people?

*Do you have a twisted view on other people?(EXAMPLE: you believe everyone is scum to be taken advantage of)

*Do you have no real plan on settling down?

*Do you like to piss people off?

These three types are the most general types of survivors ACCORDING to me...
The next three sections will have additional guidelines and equipment for each different type of survivor.

Step 3: Lone Wolf Guidelines & Equipment

You are the lone wolf, most elite of the survivor types.

What matters is however is how long your going to be a lone wolf?
You can't be a lone wolf for a extended period of time, sooner or later you'll need to form a group in order to begin the process of rebuilding humanity.
 now however you are content with being alone.
These fictional characters are some examples of the Lone Wolf survivor type, Eli from the book of Eli, Tallahassee from Zombie-land, and Alice from resident evil.

           Additional guidelines
1# Their is no "safe" their is only "safer"
2# Use your blade more then your gun
3# Don't get bored, you'll become paranoid.
4# Be aware of everything around you
5# make logical decisions

This is my suggested list for Lone Wolf gear

1# Dual-sport motorcycle (14000$-18950$)
2# AK-47 w/ scope & flash suppressor (2200$-3450$)
3# Mac 10 (3600$)
4# six clips for the AK-47 & two AK-47 drum clips ( 200$-240$)
5# three full clips for the mac-10 (45$-65$) (filled with ammo)
6# Cold steel machete (25$)
7# Small world band radio (150$)
8# repair kit & cleaning kits for both firearms
9# Gas mask (35$-250$)
10# Ka-Bar usmc fighting knife (60$)

Note i choose the AK-47 because most likely your going up against a group of raiders that will kill you for your equipment, and a automatic weapon is good against multiple attackers. if you followed guideline number 5 you will have enough sense not to use automatic against zombies, why not use automatic on a zombie? first off it's a waste of ammo, second off zombies are only killed by head-shots, although it may be unnecessary to kill a zombie because of decapitation of the head, or you "torso-boy'ed" the zombie, it ensures that the persistent undead turd is dead.

Step 4: The Alpha Guidelines & Equipment

You are the alpha, leader of a group of zombie slayers.
what matters is that you keep the moral of your group in sufficent levels, if you don't... your team may turn against you, and then your stuck in the lone wolf stage, essentially back at square one. It is essential that you have a decent plan and an idea of what your up against.

Additional Guidelines for the Alpha and the Alpha's group
1# Act as one and kill as one
2# make logical decisions
3# Don't get drunk, you'll end up zombie chow...
4# Don't use drugs, you'll end up zombie chow....

This is my suggested list for The Alpha and his group members
1# 12 gauge 6-shot shotgun (950$)   (replace with your current firearm if you have one)
2# 9mm pistol  (350$-450$)   (for each team member)
3# 4X4 S.U.V. w/ off-road tires (5000$-19000$) (optional depending on situation)
4# 3 clips for the 9mm pistol (necessary) (roughly 20$)
5# ammunition for forty kills (main firearm only) (for each team member) (75$)
6# C.Q.C. weapon ( necessary for each team member) (12$-240$)
7# Hand-held Radio (to communicate with in case of seperation) (45$- 90$)
8# cleaning kit & tool kit (for firearm & for optional vehicle)
9# molotov cocktails (one per team member)
10# Bullet-proof vest (just in case) (440$-1900$)

I've chosen  the shotgun because of its sheer stopping power and of its common ammunition, the shotgun also is perfect when escaping an infested area.

The next Instructable will be on the deceiver.

Step 5: The Deceiver Guidlines & Equipment

(Note before i start this, i bear no grudge on good lawyers, it's just the common greedy lawyers that piss me off.)

You are the deceiver, tricky and sly, just like a fox. you may have experience in the law (which is corrupt) or you may have been a con artist before the W.T.S.H.T.F., what matters now is that you use your wits to out smart everyone you meet into becoming your "prey".

I hate these types of survivors, they despise me.
Here are some examples of deceivers, Wichita from zombie land and the Asian lady in the book of Eli.

If your this survivor  type  i am not going to help you out, because these type of people hinder the progress of rebuilding civilization, and that is the polar opposite of what you are suppose to accomplish.

Step 6: W.T.S.H.T.F. Training

Although apocalypse may not be a zombie attack, its still good to prepare for the whole apocalypse package...

These are just a few of the many training programs or services that will aid in your survival.

 1# Military combative role (useful)

2# Krav Maga (A.K.A. Israeli military "karate" extremely lethal) (Some sort of martial arts is Extremely vital)
3# Trek and/or a 7-day hike at least once every three months

4# Motorcycle riding

5# S.W.A.T. Squad training (very useful)

6# Hostile Environment training (This training teaches you how to not get shot) (vital)

 7# gun maintenance (Extremely vital)

8# Weapon training (some sort of weapon training is Extremely vital, if you can find it, crow-bar or a machete training will be very useful)

Note you should have at least two of these training programs if you are to have a 45% chance of survival...yes, there is no gurantee on your survival, you just have to follow and hope your training paid off.

That is the sad and painful truth, many people will die, your family may die, your friends may die, that is the painful truth, live with it! deal with it! Avenge their death! you must live!

The next section will be about choosing a weapon if the prescribed weapons are either unattainable or by personal and/or financial reasons. Darn money, why can't we just get assault rifles for free?

Step 7: The Primary Weapon.

This is where the fun begins, what firearm should you buy? this is serious however, you need to think that you will be using it in the most grueling conditions imaginable for a firearm, and then make a wise decision.

1# Assault Rifles

Obviously, in previous wars with Vietnam and gulf war, The m-16 and m-4 proved themselves to be the Most Unreliable firearm in the world. although it's better then nothing, the m-16, in layman's terms, sucks.......badly. Popular American arrogance has brain-washed people into believing that America has the "best" weapons, clearly it does not. 

   However...there is a way to atone for your arrogance, Join the AK side of the force..... the AK-47 is not only used by over fifty countries as their infantry's primary weapon , but it is one of the best and cheapest assault rifles out their, in Africa you can buy a AK-47 for roughly 50$, meaning it costs roughly Three cows and  two goats just to buy one of the most amazing assault rifles on this planet.However... something to consider when buying a AK-47...Can you handle it?  In all seriousness in this Instructable, the AK has the kick of a mule, it will kick like Chuck Norris does. You would have to train for handling such a beast, while with the M-16 a ordinary gun-happy teenager could shoot the M-16 just by video game experience and a brief tutorial from a person who knows proper gun maintenance. Their is another problem that comes to mind when considering buying a AK-47.... how are you going to obtain it? the company sells fully automatic rifles only to military personnel, you can however obtain a "civilian" version of the AK-47, this is however...not a assault rifle, but you still can convert them illegally, this is however very illegal... and you would be in jail for approximately 20-30 years, maybe more if unlucky... but with a M-16 you can strut around with it in public like some gun-toting rooster, popular American arrogance at its finest!

2# Semi-Automatic Rifles

This genre of firearms is best suited against zombies and a few human attackers, as they have usually a bigger round, better accuracy when dealing with medium-long distance targets and some older semi-auto rifles include bayonets, which is a valuable asset when your rifle jams or is out of ammunition. Another reason to purchasing a older military model, is that the older military models usually are chambered for a bigger round.Take in consideration the M-1 Garand, It is chambered for the impressive 30-06, which is a bigger round then the 7.62x39 MM, and it has better accuracy at longer range. The M-1 Garand is also more simple then the AK-47 in terms of number of parts, and is easier to acquire legally. good Garands are hard to come by, and those that do have a hefty price tag (In most cases).
If you wish to purchase a Ultimate Zombie Fuckulator, you will not be disappointed with the sheer power of the M-1 Garand!

3#The Shotgun

Ah....The Shotgun...One of the few Classical U.Z.F.'S.The shotgun is a Superior weapon when dealing with humans and zombies alike due to its ability to kill multiple attackers at close range. Because of the lead balls inside the buck-shot, it can be used to kill at least four or six human attackers, and may have the ability to disable about three or four zombies with a well placed shotgun blast, making it a superior weapon for close-range encounters. There is lots of variants of shotguns, from double-barreled turkey shotguns, to the Spaz-12. When picking out a shotgun, take under consider what it was designed to do. For instance, The Benneli M4 Super 90, a semi-automatic shotgun designed for the U.S. military, is the Ultimate Zombie Fuckulator in the shotgun class, because of it's ability of attaching accessories such as night sights, scopes and possibly a GRENADE LAUNCHER! This is of course if you can obtain a grenade launcher.
 I suggest this type of firearm for people not use to firing guns, because accuracy isn't a terrible issue when it comes to shotguns.

4#Lever/Bolt-Action RIfles

  Although some consider these archaic weapons, some are not actually bad to have. Most are reliable. the M-1 Springfield and the Mauser 98k would be the best choice, the M-1 Springfield's 30-06 round can still be bought, opposed to the Mauser's 8 mm Mauser round. These weapons however, i advise not to buy because older military firearms are usually not available and/or the ammunition used is no longer available.

The next section will be about your secondary weapon.

Step 8: The Secondary Firearm.

Now that you have decided what your primary firearm will be, you need to determine what side-arm to purchase.

These are some things to consider when purchasing your back-up.
1#How powerful is it?
2# Does it have enough stopping power?
3# Is the round that the firearm is chambered for common?
4# can you afford it?
5# how reliable is this weapon?
6# Are you trained it use it?

1# Pistols

Pistols are a mixed blessing, they are easier to reload then revolvers, yet they are twice as hard to clean. this must be considered if you plan for optimum performance on the road.
This is all i will type about the pistol section due to the numerous amount of extremely amazing pistols, I'll list my top five pistols to use during W.T.S.H.T.F. day.
1# Mac-10
2# Macro-Uzi chambered for 45 ACP
3# TEC-9
4# Military Version Glock
5# Tokarev scorpion pistol

2# Revolvers

Revolvers are easier to clean and are cheaper, revolvers have very common cartridges to add on to the many advantages. Since revolvers are hard to reloading the hands of a beginner, their strictly for quick combat scenarios.
here is my top three revolvers for W.T.S.H.T.F. day.
1#Smith & Wesson medium barreled, .357
2#Taurus long barreled revolver, .454 cassual
3#Smith & Wesson lady smith, .357

The next section will be about what type of vehicle you should get.

Step 9: The Vehicle

Okay, if you aren't in exact shape to hike to Alaska, fine. just keep in mind that sooner or later your vehicle's gas tank will run dry and you will most likely be hundreds of miles from a gas station with even a drop of gas. keep in mind that gasoline and other fuel types will be extremely rare and will fetch a higher barter "price" then almost all goods that are necessary for survival (at least that is my prediction).

their are four things to look for in choosing a vehicle suitable for apocalypse
1# gas mileage
2# off road capabilities
3# resilience to the elements
4# ability to carry extra goods

The first three point in the direction that you choose a motorcycle, most motorcycles have 40-65 miles to the gallon, more or less depending on what you choose, if you choose a Harley (i hate Harley-Davidson) then expect 30 miles to the gallon and no off road capabilities, if you choose a dual-sport motorcycle, such as a Yamaha super Tenere, then expect it to handle almost all of the grueling conditions in apocalypse and still making roughly 35-55 miles to the gallon.

Other people would rather have a four wheeled vehicle such as a SUV or a truck, these type of vehicles may excel at number 2&4 requirements, but the lack in the other extremely necessary requirements.

The best of the motorcycles is either the BMW 1200gs adventure or the Yamaha super tenere, simply because of their off-road supremacy and because of the distance you can go with these two amazing bikes.

the next section will be on Melee Weapons, OH YEAH CROWBAR FTW!

Step 10: Anti-Zombie Melee Weapons

You just ran out of ammunition and you have 2 or 4 zombies chasing you... now is the time to go melee.

You will find that a melee weapon is absolutely necessary for surviving in the future that is filled with death and peril, simply because later on their will be literally no ammunition for guns, leaving people in a world similar to a time when the sword was the best weapon for combat, you will need to condition yourself to a similar strength to the knights in medieval Europe or to the samurai's of feudal japan, anyway your going to need to learn a form of Kenjutsu (kenjutsu is the art of the sword in Japanese, A.K.A sword fighting).

Although kenjutsu is designed for you to face against opponents with other weapons and that they don't know how to use them, Its nothing compared to what the knights in Medieval Europe studied. The art of the European sword is a lost art, but you can still find manuals that will teach you this deadly art.Although the Knights of medieval and renaissance Europe had second-class swords compared to what the Japanese sword-smiths made, the European way of the sword is focused on one thing, killing your opponent in a swift and brutal manner, which is what you are suppose to accomplish.

Anyway, their are several types of swords, my favorite? the British long-sword, if you can find a sword-smith at a local renaissance fair that sells hand-made swords, buy one and study the art of the sword, you will never regret it, the art makes most individuals into cold-blooded swordsman with supreme hand to hand combat abilities, some of these swords can fetch prices of up to 2000$-4000$ though.......

if money and time is a concern, buy a machete, because most good quality machetes are around 40$ to 60$, they are way less expensive although most machetes lack power and steel quality, they are still better then nothing.

Well....that is all the advice i have for you!

Step 11: Some Advice

Their is no guarantee of your survival, only skill and hope will increase your chances of surviving.

Otherwise have a blast smash'in zombie skulls!

I hope this instructable benefited the people who will actually take note of this comprehensive guide to help, but under no means guarantee, their chances of survival.

Good luck future zombie slayers, you'll need it......