Introduction: How to Slice an Orange Correctly, Like a 9 Year Old

About: Flemming changed the the world with a saucer and a bit of mold. Florence Nightingale changed the world with a tiny lamp, walking silent rounds among the wounded and dying. Einstein: chalk. Pasteur: chickens. A…

My sweet Vivie told me I was slicing oranges wrong. I didn't know how right she was!

Here's a little guide on how to slice oranges so each slice is equally good to eat while waste is minimized.

Step 1: Listen to Your Kids. They Are Certainly Listening to You.

I thought, who cares how it is sliced? Just eat your orange, Vivie.

The way I learned to cut oranges was to cut them in half vertically then slice wedges with the pith strand at the beginning of each cut. Vivie said that that makes getting your teeth up against the inside of the peel difficult.
She's right. With a concave peel it is more difficult to clean all the flesh off and that leads to pulp and membrane between my teeth. Who knew?!

The other problem, she said, is that the orange is rolling around while I'm trying to slice it, making it more likely that I'll cut myself.

Right again, Viv.

Step 2: Just Hand the 7 Year Old Your Knife and No One Gets Hurt

Fine, Vivie. Show me what you're made of.

1. She starts by halving the orange vertically, like before.

2. She lays the halves on their flat sides and cuts off the navel peel. Very stable cuts.

3. She makes parallel slices across the grain.

4. She flips the end around and cuts the stem edge off.

5. I am dumb.

Step 3: Clean Bites

Isn't she a vision? What a delightful girl.

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